Do you ever feel like you are so happy you could die? I am. Sorry to the readership about my long absentias from this blog, you can blame a certain asshole named mike who said that six weeks was not enough and that more time was needed for me to stay in the home. But now I am out because of no insurance and I feel like a million dollar bill. And I am so glad to be even writing to you now, because for a short time it looked like I might be going to jail. It was arson, if you must know, which they didn't have enough evidence to indict me on and which I am fairly to middle certain I didn't do. e.g., my ex-girlfriend Sara's apartment building burnt up in a blaze of red. If you remember Sara you remember how she used to be my girlfriend and I don't have time to get into this now (sorry!) but let me just say that we were together a long time and then she cheated on me with her boss even though we were together and she had said things which equal promises, which of course hurts then but it doesn't any more because of the fire. RAMBLING I know. Long story short is that a couple of months ago I was playing on my nintendo 64 (Banjo Kazooie: a hard game but fun because of the characters, who represent me) and I was drinking so much because of a frustrating level (I won't get into it but it was Rusty Bucket Bay) and then I just started drinking vodka after vodka mixed with gin and then when I came to I was in Philadelphia outside of a holiday inn hotel. Wierd! But not so wierd if you know it was an episode, which you guessed it it was. What was I doing there? Soon enough police found me but not before someone had given me some clothes and put me in the home. And that's when I heard about the fire, which pretty much nobody was hurt in except some birds. And which if I did do it I can barely remember. But anyway I guess someone burned it down with gasoline in the stairwell. But how could they say it was me if I was in Philly? (if you have info I am not interested.)
But the main point at stake here is that I feel so much better about the whole situation and I feel like I can face the world with a straight back. And I don't bleed in my dreams anymore. I thought it would never end!
Sunday, January 02, 2005
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Is anyone here? This blog hasn't been updated in long time. I kind of miss it. -Frank
Hey. This is Frank again. If this blog is going to be abandoned, maybe I'll just squat it out and make it my own. So here's my first entry.
I got fired from work three days ago. While this may suck for obvious financial reasons, the good news is that I'll now have lots of time to post in the comment section of this blog. I'm not really too upset about losing my job. I was good at it, but I sure didn't like it. And unemployment will be enough to carry me by, at least for a little while. So hey, I'm upbeat, you know? Wife is being supportive, says that with my skills I shouldn't have a hard time finding another job, etc., and it feels really good to know that she's gonna stick by me even when I'm kind of at a low point. Of course, it's only been three days...give it a month and see what happens... Once I get addicted to television and stop working out, once my gut begins to grow like a blossoming flower on a fine spring morn. Yeah, we'll see what she thinks then. Right now, though, she's totally tops. So honey, if I let you read this: Thanks, Meg. That's a good note to leave on for now. I'll try and keep everybody updated on what's going on. If you're not interested, it ain't my blog - just don't read the comments. Talk to you soon,
Frank
Hey. Me again. In a preemptive move to keep my awesome six-pack, I'm forcing myself not to sit around. Just so my ass doesn't branch out and root itself to the couch, I've decided to build a clubhouse out back. Our backyard has quite a few trees, and right now I've got quite a bit of time. So construction has begun. I imagine you're thinking, "Hey Frank. Aren't you a little old to be playing in a clubhouse?" Well right you are. I am too old. It's for my son. So now, if you know me, you're probably thinking, "Hey Frank. Isn't your son a little young for a clubhouse?" Right you are again. My son is 2, and probably not quite ready for a clubhouse. But you need to think ahead here. My son will eventually be 6, and then he's going to love it. Plus, by that time, if I'm still unemployed, his clubhouse will have grown larger than our actual home. Yeah, it's a project. Right now I'm pretty much just handing out resumes and building the best clubhouse the world will ever see. Meg thinks it's a little weird, but she says it's "weird in a cute way." I think what she means by that, is that it's a good way to keep me busy, just so long as I'm not spending all of my unememployment checks on wood and power tools. She's a smart woman.
Talk to you later,
Frank
Hey. It's Tuesday and I've officially spent my entire unemployement check on wood and power tools. So that's not true at all... I only spent about 3 hours on the clubhouse today, but the foundation is looking pretty good. I imagine I'll have it done in a few more days. I also personally dropped my resume off at three different places. Dressed up in a suit and everything. I feel too old to be doing it, and I really hope I'm coming off calm and natural. I feel like a high school kid begging for a paper route. Two of the places were really nice though. Very friendly, and very polite. Both of them told me that I'd hear from then within 3-4 days. The other place had a rather surely mid-twenties assistant who took the resume with a kind of gruff "thanks," and then proceeded to put the resume in a pile of other papers. I just stood there awkwardly for a few seconds, nervous and holding my breath, before I showed myself out. Yeah, but anyway, I think the secretary thought I was a hunk and was just playing super bitch for attention. I told Meg, and Meg said she was "super jealous." She said it real casual like, so I know she must have really been fuming. Or, conversely, Meg knew I was full of crap and was kind enough to humor me. I guess I'll never know.
So that's today's update. On a side note, however, I wonder how many other people take up abandoned blogs. I'm sure I'm not the first, but I haven't seen anybody else do it. I realize it's kind of a strange way of blogging, but to me it seems more private and more personal. I feel that even if readers of thetikiroom's regular blog writings find this, it's not the same kind of blogging and it probably wouldn't interest them. In other words, Stephen and I probably have different target demographics. Stephen, if you do ever read this, I hope this is okay with you. If not, I'll be happy to start over someplace else.
Thanks,
Frank
So my wife pointed out that I haven't really mentioned Mark yet. Of course, she's wrong. I mentioned that I had a son and that he was only 2. That being said, it IS kind of odd that I've posted here a total of 4 times (first comment isn't mine) and haven't really gone into depth about my own son. Lets put it on the table, shall we? There are a lot of baby blogs out there. I've seen them. They're filled with adorable pictures, and witty observations that have been made, within the last century alone, upwards of six billion times. I say this, but I would like to take special care to note that I am no better and no different. Mark is a genius, he's cute, and he's better than just about any other baby out there (I'm talking about you, Paulson family baby!). I'll probably enter him in pageants. Not true. But I could. Seriously, he's that precious. Mark's only 29 months, and he's quite wordy. He likes elephants right now. "Elefun! Ele-funnnn!" Just so everybody knows, it turns out an orphan elephant, name of "Babar" became a king elephant. I guess it was a pretty big deal. It must have been, since I'm repeatedly asked to read his history at a minimum of once a day. But I love it. I've got a great elefun voice. Now this is not going to be a baby blog (Sorry Meggers. You'll have to find a different blog to take over). I don't know what it IS going to be, but I figure I'll just write about things as they come. Like this? A mission statement 5 posts in? Anyway, that's about it for now. Just wanted to post an entry that wasn't all about not having a job. And, let's face it, mark is a very worthy subject. Let me leave any readers with a piece of advice: If you see an elephant walking around with a crown on his head, show some respect, huh? You're representing your country!
Thanks,
Frank
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